003 - Flood - OPEN

[changeitroundsome]

[It took him a long time to get the communicator working, it turns out webbed feet are not precisely ambidextrous enough to get the job done with any sense of efficiency. It's certainly too heavy for him to move, so the view is a little frog, peering over the communicator into the camera. He gives a hopeful smile, if a frog could manage such a thing. He's giving it a good try, regardless.]

Bonjour! Don't suppose there's anyone here who can help me out of my room? Seems I got myself into trouble with a witch, and now I got all kind of trouble reaching my door.

[Another pause.] Princess would be welcome, too. The spell breaking sort.

Comments

[voice/spam]

[routemistress]

[It's still Iris' voice: it's only the accent and intonation that are quite, quite different.]

It never pays to inconvenience a witch, young man.

[But a moment later, the doorknob turns and the door swings open. There's a little hut sitting outside in the hallway.]

[changeitroundsome]

[And sitting there, looking up, is indeed a frog. Facilier nods his head in gratitude.]

Thanking you kindly, darlin'. Thought I was gonna be stuck here forever.

[routemistress]

[The little hut creaks up onto its clawed, scaly legs so it can lean forward to examine the frog more closely; and then its door opens.

The woman sitting cross-legged in the hut's doorway is still Iris: an Iris showing the effects of another 900 years of hard drinking and bad decisions, perhaps. She's silver-haired, crabbed and warty, and her sunken face makes her nose and chin so prominent that they almost meet across her mouth.

The hand that shoots out, snakeswift, to seize the frog by its legs is a smaller edition of the hut's claws.]

How adorable. How precious! A man in a frog's skin, how perfectly delicious. What shall we do with him?

[changeitroundsome]

[That hut is terrifying and Facilier crouches his little body closer to the ground. His shadow, also frog shaped, seems to be panicking, flying around the room. Facilier ignores it to instead watch the witch, leaping far too late to evade capture. He dangles there, haplessly.]

I was hoping we could cut a deal, once I'm back to myself, I could really help y'all out. I'm a prince you know, got all sorts of wealth ripe for the taking.

[video]

[walkingmeltdown]

Sadly I cannot offer you a princess. I'm in rather a lack of one myself, and cannot return home again until I find one.

But if I can't break your curse I can at least assist you. Can you better direct me to where you are?

[routemistress]

[She strokes his head with one long, iron fingernail.]

It's adorable that you think any amount of wealth is worth more to me than a talking frog, little one.

...but perhaps I may let you win your freedom. Up in the gardens, there's a well. It's deeper than an ocean, colder than an airless moon - and at the bottom of the well, there's a box.

Bring me that box, and I shall free you.

[video]

[changeitroundsome]

Ah, real shame. I'm sure we'll both find what we're looking for eventually.

Thanking you kindly! I'm in room 215.

[changeitroundsome]

[He should have known it was a trap. He tries to wiggle away, but to no avail. Had he been himself, he would have been twisting this into a deal of his own, play her needs against her. Alas, he is not himself, so he doesn't.]

A box? That's all? I think I could just about manage that.

[video]

[walkingmeltdown]

Of course. After all, what you seek eventually you shall find. Perhaps not in the time and manner of your choosing.

I'll try and find you, then. Hopefully I'll see you soon.

[video]

[changeitroundsome]

'Course not, and this is but one boat, there has to be some princesses running around here somewhere.

You're too kind, my friend!

[spam]

[walkingmeltdown]

[Fortunately for the frog, he isn't too far away. He's already had a mild run in with a semi sentient forest on this same floor.

He reaches the door and swings it open. Peering down at the frog is a younger, dark-haired man dressed like your standard fairy tale prince.]

And there you are. Hopefully now, you'll have a more sporting chance at finding your maiden fair.

[changeitroundsome]

[The frog hops over, and nods his head in thanks.]

And I'll be sure you're repaid for your gratitude. Could never do it without your help.

[walkingmeltdown]

Repaid? Should I ask how? [He can't help but be amused.]

[youwillgotohell]

[It may only be because she's been a chameleon struggling to be understood that Morgana pauses at this entry. It doesn't stop the smile from tugging at her mouth, though. Her sympathy only stretches so far: at least he can talk.]

Has someone come to ferry you along yet?

[changeitroundsome]

I'm sure I can find some way to help you out. You got my word.

[changeitroundsome]

[How good of her. Still, she isn't trying to murder him, so there's that.]

They have, thank you kindly, all the same though. [Then, kind of hopeful:] Don't suppose ya'll happen to be a princess?

[walkingmeltdown]

Word is good, then, I suppose - whether it comes from man, beast or frog.

[He crouches a bit, kneeling, so the frog doesn't have to keep looking at him towering above.]

There's no need for your gratitude, but I accept it all the same.

[changeitroundsome]

It's always important to me, you got to be thankful to the folk who help you out.

[walkingmeltdown]

It's the honorable way. And, the way of the good of heart. I'm sorry that this curse befell, you friend. It seems to me it could have found a far more deserving home.

[changeitroundsome]

Thank you kindly, and I wouldn't wish this on anyone. [In this altered state of mind. Hah hah.]

[youwillgotohell]

[She purses her lips, unfortunately not 100% sure where this is going: these aren't the sort of fairy tales she grew up on.]

In a manner of speaking. Why do you ask?

[changeitroundsome]

Well, I need something of a favour, to get me back to myself. One only a princess could offer.

[youwillgotohell]

And that would be?

[changeitroundsome]

Only one kiss, not much to ask for, in the grand scheme of things.

[youwillgotohell]

[She doesn't bother trying to stop the laugh that bubbles out.]

And how do I know you're not poisonous?

[changeitroundsome]

[He puts a little froggy font foot to his chest.]

I would never poison anybody. I ain't the sort.

[youwillgotohell]

And I should take your word for that, I suppose. I don't even know your name.

[changeitroundsome]

Prince Facilier. [He gives a little bow.] And I swear my word is all I have, but it's as good as gold.

[youwillgotohell]

[She considers for a moment, mouth pursed and eyebrows arched. Then she shrugs.]

I suppose it can't hurt.

[changeitroundsome]

[Look at so happy he is, a big dumb smile on his froggy face.]


Much obliged, you really are a lifesaver.

[youwillgotohell]

[Well okay, that's adorable.]

And where can I find you?

[changeitroundsome]

Room 215, merci beaucoup.

[youwillgotohell]

[She laughs to herself before killing the feed, but it isn't too long before she's knocking at his door and easing it open if it isn't locked.]

My lord?

[She is definitely teasing with the title, but she can't help adding it.]

[changeitroundsome]

Your highness. Sure is real pleasure to see you.

[He'll give a little froggie bow and everything. ]

[youwillgotohell]

[That is a struggle not to laugh at, but she shakes her head and moves to crouch in front of him.]

I have to say, this is not how I expected my day to go.

[changeitroundsome]

I got to admit, bein' turned into a frog wasn't something I expected, either.

[youwillgotohell]

I suppose I should remedy that.

[She hesitates a moment, but then holds out her hand so he can hop up.]

[changeitroundsome]

[He hops up with a little froggy smile.]

Of which I'll be forever obliged.

[youwillgotohell]

I hope so.

[Her mouth twists dryly, but she shrugs to herself, as if she expects little more than entertainment value - or perhaps a wart. But she can take care of that. So she leans forward, and kisses the top of his head.]

[changeitroundsome]

[Instead of a wart, she gets a sweet light show. And then, with a magical pop, there's a guy there. At least he's clothed, that's a small mercy. He glances at his hands, SWEET LORD HANDS and grins.]

Wow, that actually worked!

[youwillgotohell]

[Morgana wastes no time in stumbling backward once that light show starts, dropping the frog and putting a few feet between them.

Her eyebrows are halfway to her hairline by the time the frog is a grown ass man again.]

I didn't think it would work!

[changeitroundsome]

And you offered to help anyway.

[He smiles and inclines his head.]

A promise is a promise, though. Should you ever need anything, all you got to do is call on me.

[He'll probably regret that one day.]

[youwillgotohell]

[She'll probably try to make sure he does. Still looking half in shock, she tips her head in return.]

Then I suppose I'll hold you to it.

[changeitroundsome]

I'll be only too glad to oblige.

[He will hate it so much, but even as himself, he can't break his own deals.]

[youwillgotohell]

[She gathers herself enough to give an ironic little curtsy before heading to the door.]

There's no need to lie, Doctor. No one likes owing a debt.

[changeitroundsome]

True, but to such a lovely lady, it'd be a cross worth to bear.

[youwillgotohell]

[She laughs, pausing on the doorstep.]

Careful. I'll start to think you flatter all the women that save you from life as a frog.

[changeitroundsome]

[He chuckles and winks.]

Oh no, I save my best flattery for ladies who save me from a life as a frog.